I was a mess. Trembling with fear - terrified. They were attacking me again. This time it was by writing letters filled with lies to over 400 people in our group. This was so hard for me to believe.

 

They had seemed fairly reasonable only a few months earlier. Yet now they had turned on me, their elected president, and were attempting a coup d'état- not with bullets, but with betrayal. Several people I thought were my friends turned on me.

 

This was heart-breaking and overwhelming.

Intellectually, I felt like this was some kind of 'old stuff' -an ancient pattern being replayed. Emotionally, I was paralyzed. The day had been filled with a barrage of slanderous emails, and phone calls, the attacks were escalating. I had managed this for months -the back stabbing and lies- but today was too much.

I was shaking as I dialed Elizabeth's number. It had been several years since we had worked together, yet in this moment I knew I could trust her to help me. Sensing my severe distress she went inward, and immediately she placed Yamantanka & Mahakhala next to me and instructed me to see these Buddhas on either side of me. Within minutes I was feeling better. I felt protected.

Soon I would have to preside over a meeting with this hostile group in attendance. I had to understand why this was happening, why did I feel so attacked, why the betrayal, and why did it terrify me so?

In three deep phone sessions over the next few weeks, I discovered that I had shared several lifetimes with these irrational opposition leaders. I saw how these past experiences influenced my present. I was able to understand and bring the previous hidden dynamics to consciousness and let them go.

Each session was seminal, enlightening. I am very grateful to Elizabeth. She helped me to stabilize during that turbulent time. She worked with me to find the roots of the distention.

I understood that this group was into projecting their shadow on me. As a result of my awareness, I was able to preside over a volatile meeting and conclude my tenure as president of this polarized group. Even with over 200 people present, (half of them clearly hostile) I was able to handle the meeting better than I had ever imagined. At the end of the day, I even received a minute long standing ovation from my supporters."    C.S. OMD